Horses

Horses are commonly associated with high society, from equestrian events to polo to dressage. Don't ask me why, that's just the way it is. It is okay if you don't like horses.

Tuxedos

Please note: a "cummerbund" is the belt-type sash you wear with a tuxedo, not the shirtfront that rolls up like a flapping curtain in Looney Tunes cartoons.

Food Festivals

Food festivals, such as the Gilroy Garlic Festival, are a good opportunity to sample some fine cuisine without having to endure a stuffy restaurant.

Blow Off Some Steam

Don't be rude and blow on your food before you eat it. If your food is too hot for you, just wait.

Merging

If someone has slowed down to allow you to merge on the highway during rush hour, make eye contact with them in the rearview mirror and wave at them to let them know you appreciate it. It could really make their day. Just remember to keep your eyes on the road!

Round of Applause

Although it has fallen out of vogue in recent years, it is considered acceptable to applaud at the end of a movie you enjoyed.

Shoe Polish

Polishing one's shoes can be a bit of an undertaking. At bare minimum, you will need two rags, a brush, and shoe polish. Be prepared to set aside a portion of your day unless you don't have many shoes.

Rare?

One of the features of ordering steak is that you can select how you would prefer to have it cooked. One of the drawbacks, however, is that many gourmands contend that any steak cooked medium well or well done dries out the steak and robs it of its flavor. Some chefs even consider such an order to be an insult! If you are worried about potentially being embarrassed due to this, ask about the fish of the day.

White Rice

White rice may seem nutritious, but it is loaded with carbohydrates, which quickly turn to fat. Try brown rice, or wheat bread.

Tea Time

Remember that tea is an after-dinner drink. If you have tea before dinner, it will just make you hot, and possibly sweaty.

Clever Breakfasts

If you want to try something unusual, consider a dash of hot sauce on your scrambled eggs. It can be quite a morning pick-me-up!

Reading Glasses

If your eyesight is beginning to go, you can pick up a pair of reading glasses at any drugstore. You needn't have a prescription, they are basically a fancy magnifying glass.

Steaks

It is considered the height of rudeness to apply steak sauce or even worse, ketchup to a steak you have ordered in a restaurant. However, when cooking steak at home, you may add whichever condiments you choose. Unless you are trying to impress someone.

Handkerchiefs

Although some people balk at the idea of a reusable tissue, they can come in incredibly handy (see my earlier post regarding keeping a rag in the car). Just make sure you wash them regularly.

San Francisco

Did you know that the Golden Gate Bridge only charges admission if you actually go over the bridge? You can park in the observation parking lot and look at it all day for free if you so choose!

Hanging Files

Did you know that most file cabinets come equipped with rails running along the top of the sides of each drawer? These are for "Hanging Files" which you can place file folders in. It is a great way to organize files if you keep files for some reason.

Jazz

Jazz is widely perceived to be the music of cultured people, but it is important that you know some jazz musicians if you talk about music. Some jazz musicians of note: John Coltrane, Miles Davis.

Hawaiian Food

If someone asks you to go to eat some Hawaiian Food with them, DON'T PANIC. The Hawaiians make a dish called "Chicken Katsu" which is just fried chicken.

Live Performances

At some venues like comedy clubs, it is okay to laugh or cry or react to the performance, but the performers don't want you to talk to your fellow audience members. The employees of the venue will kick you right out, don't think they won't. Show some respect.

Corduroy

Corduroy gets a bad rap from a lot of people, but did you know that corduroy pants come in different thicknesses of "ridges"? Shop around, you may be surprised!

Margins

Although you are free to write in the margins when you are not going to be showing your papers to anyone, remember that you should NEVER write in the margins on a resume.

Gifting Books

Books are a thoughtful gift, but make sure to stick to the classics like Dickens and Poe. Contemporary literature may devolve into smut or profanity which is inappropriate in a gift.

Restaurant Restrooms.

It is only a law that employees must wash their hands after using the restroom. If you don't work there, washing your hands is optional, but considerate nonetheless.

Breakfast Advice

You will find that it is easier to apply butter before applying syrup, rather than vice-versa. This rule is universal for all breakfast items.

Silverware

Polishing silverware is incredibly time-consuming. Get silverware that is stainless steel and spare yourself the hassle. No one will be the wiser!

Mixed Nuts

Although cashews are the classiest nut, they can be very expensive. If you are looking to save money but still offer a quality nut to your guests, go for a mixed nuts assortment that includes cashews. The big ones are Brazil Nuts.

Scents

Colognes fall into one of four main scents: Fruity, Sweet, Floral, or Musk. Old Spice is the only cologne in a fifth category, "Spicy".

Wine Glasses

A wine glass with a wide mouth is for red wine, to allow the wine to "breathe" whereas a wine glass with a tapered mouth is for white wine. Try not to use a pint glass for drinking wine, as the mouth is flared, thus rendering it unacceptable for any wine. Beer is okay.

Taboos

As the old saying goes, "It is impolite to discuss politics and religion." If either of these topics comes up in a social setting, politely excuse yourself and retire home. There is no need to expose yourself to such rudeness. If you are the host, you can feel free to ask the offending parties to leave.

Car Interior

Tired of unsightly dust covering your dashboard? Most automotive parts stores sell dashboard covers. They come in a variety of colors and can really class up the cabin of your vehicle. Make sure you are getting the proper size for your car!

Movies vs. Plays

At the movie theater, you can almost sit wherever you want, so you are guaranteed the best seat in the house so long as you get there early enough to sit in the middle. Please keep in mind that when attending a live play or the opera, you will have assigned seating. Check your ticket stub! Failing that, ask an usher to assist you.

Blinds

If you turn your venetian blinds so that the inside edge points up, no one will be able to see inside your house. Most people think that venetian blinds will protect your privacy so long as they are shut. Not so! If you rotate them so that the inside edge points down, tall creeps can see inside your house.

Windows

You can increase your productivity by spraying the Windex directly on the window, rather than on the paper towel.

Franks and Beans

Certain beans are an acceptable side dish for all levels of dining, yet no franks are as far as I can tell. I don't understand it either.

Explanation

A "Mnemonic" is a memory tool you use to remember information. For example, to remember the names and order of the planets, you probably know the phrase, "My Very Eccentric Mother Just Sent Us Nine Pizzas." Although "Pizzas" is no longer a planet.

Place Setting Mnemonic

"Fork" has four letters, and forks go to the left of the plate. "Knife" and "Spoon" have five letters each and go to the right of the plate. "Glass" has five letters. There is no set position for a "Glass".

High-End Desserts

Don't be intimidated by fancy words on fancy menus. "Tart" and "Souffle" are often just gussied-up terms for "Pie" and "Cake," respectively.

Golf

Proper footwear is vitally important in golf. If you even think of going golfing while wearing sneakers or flip-flops, you will be the laughing stock of the golf club! Play it smart: golf shoes are also called "cleats".

Guide To Confusing Meats 2

Carnitas = Pork
Carne Asada = Steak
Squab = Tiny Chicken

Bathroom Class 3

A bathrobe is a one-way ticket to a classy bathing situation. Wearing a nice bathrobe to and from the bathroom leaves little room for embarrassing towel mishaps. It is like a one-way ticket to feeling like you're high society!

Bathroom Class 2

Throwing a wet towel on the ground screams "I just moved out of my parents' house". Do yourself a favor and invest in a towel rack and hamper.

Bathroom Class

Nothing is more tacky than a little sliver of soap in the soap dish, PLUS they are hard to handle to boot! I usually toss them when they are about as wide as my thumb. How much money are you really saving using soap all the way to the end?